NEW SINGLE ARTWORK : t-boz - champion

The TLC-alum brings forth an early contender for 2013's "Crappiest Cover" award. I feel like I'm staring at a tramp stamp of some wayward hussy who couldn't decide between Viner Hand ITC or some kind of oriental typeface to use for her beloved's name, just above her ass... #ratchet

NEW SINGLE ARTWORK : nicki minaj - freedom

Oh lord...

NEW SINGLE ARTWORK : nicole scherzinger - boomerang

Good lawd this is awful. 

So awful in fact I felt that the "5 ways in which Nicole Scherzinger's 'Boomerang' artwork is awful" rundown, was necessary....

1) That logo. Why are they still trying to make that logo work? It's use in the 'Killer Love' era wasn't iconic enough to then use it like it's a recognisable monogram, that must be stamped on everything associated with her... 

2) The over saturated lip look. Not since her tacky "Impress Press-On Manicure by Broadway Nails" endorsement has she had such a fashion related fail... 

3) That awkward box around "Boomerang". At first glance I thought it was a watermark from an over-enthusastic all things Aussie-related website. The boxing of type reminds me of the artist Example as well...never good.

4) Awkward brush marks + 5) Awkwardly coloured brush marks. What in the hell was the designer thinking?

"Hey! I want to make fans feel it's really easy to recreate this cover, lets use an effect that any Tom, Dick or Harry can get his hands on...and colour it purple and green."

A mess. Probably winner of 2012's worst cover...well done Scherzy.

NEW SINGLE ARTWORK : ashlee simpson - bat for a heart

So the better Simpson sister is about to embark on her comeback to the music scene - bursting out the gate with 'Bat For A Heart'. The song is killer...the artwork is filler. That type?!? I was hoping this was some awful fan made! It ruins that flawless b'n'w photo, with all it's ratchet, 70s computer looking-ness...

! updated ! NEW ALBUM ARTWORK : nicki minaj - pink friday : roman reloaded : the re-up

Ugh...

NEW ALBUM ARTWORK : nicki minaj - pink friday : roman reloaded : the re-up

UPDATE : OOOH, delightful, Nix has decided to bless us with the correct shaped version of the cover...ughh! See it here...

Please tell me that all visitors to simonsez-CD out there know why this artwork is an ugly-ass, hot, steaming pile of wasted pixels.

No? Then lemme school ya'.

1. It uses about a thousand fonts...none of which look any where near decent.

2. That blur effect used on said fonts. That. Blur. Effect. Ugh...

3. It is rectangle in shape. Unless Ms. Minaj is planning on redesigning the age-old artwork shape (which I highly doubt), I think a swift rejig of this disaster is in order...in fact scrap it completely and just go with a close up of her ass.

4. The image is from the 'I Am Your Leader' video - a) Using a video still for artwork is never good and b) THAT WAS A SINGLE FROM 'ROMAN RELOADED' WHICH ISN'T THIS ALBUM!!! AGGGGHHHH

I can't... I can't...

In fact, I can.

For someone with the amount of talent that Nicki has, and with that the major label backing and funds and teams of people surrounding her - why is no one stepping in and stopping her from releasing these weak and shameful excuses for album covers? It truly baffles me. I really do believe that she has no eye for design or branding (see: Her unveiling her ugly perfume bottle on Twitter, with an image that consisted of approx 4.5 pixels...low quality and nasty). It is a real shame - as in a world where image is everything, I believe that people will soon stop buying into her shoddy image or worse the legacy she leaves behind will be defined by the awful artwork she releases.

NEW ALBUM ARTWORK : destiny's child - playlist : the very best of destiny's child

So, when it was announced a couple of months back that a new Destiny's Child release was in the pipeline, the blogosphere went wild...then it was announced that it was a new compilation album :/ The artwork looks like one of those godawful unofficial compilations that supermarkets throw together (as in cheap 'n' nasty) - the only saving grace is that photo, from the 'Destiny Fulfilled' era, is flawwwwwwless!

NEW ALBUM ARTWORK : christina aguilera - lotus

Hmmmm....Hmmmmmmmm...

I am not sure if I like it. The 'Your Body' artwork felt sexy, subtle and well done. This feels so heavy handed, at first I thought it was a fan made! *Photoshop siren* :/ I know she's trying to go for 'Stripped'-era realness, but it's coming across as cheap 'n' nasty. Finger's crossed for a slightly more demure deluxe edition version!

p.s. If you tilt your screen back, you see a whole lot more of Ms. Ag...

NEW EP & BACK COVER ARTWORK : d. woods - my favourite colour : volume 1

So, from Ke$ha making colourful and gaudy work...to a Danity Kane alum making it fall flat on it's ass for her latest EP release:

p.s. What is it with chicks splashing around in the paint and thinking it looks hot??

NEW REMIX SINGLE ARTWORK : britney spears - till the world ends (twister remix)

I know it's only a promo single...but this artwork is seriously offending my sense of sight. Did not one of Brit's team think to step in and say "Hol' up, hol' up, hol' up, holllll' up! This looks like shit!". No one?

NEW SINGLE ARTWORK : nervo & hook n sling - reason

I am only posting this as my gals Nervo are attached to it...this artwork DOES NOT get a simonsez seal of approval...it is a certified hot mess.

NEW SINGLE ARTWORK : mariah carey - triumphant (get 'em) (ft. rick ross & meek mill)

OHHOLYLAWWWWD :/ Mimi...whatcha gone and done? The type placing is just awful, the added bar for the "features" at the bottom feels clunky, the size of "Triumphant" is too big...it all feels like a less classily done, almost "fan remake" of the 'Emancipation of Mimi' album cover...

NEW EP ARTWORK : havana brown - when the lights go out

So after I showed you how photoshop editing can be done well (a la JoJo) - I now show you how it can be overused and create something so unsubtle and nasty looking, it really makes you question whether you want to delve into the music within. Case: DJ Havana Brown, Australian diva who gifted us the delight called 'We Run The Night' a few months back. She has now released her debut EP (a taster before her debut album) and the cover is some garishness that even someone with a strong stomach would retch at. The over soft, 'glow' look added to her skin is what chaps my ass most - who thinks that looks good? Grr! Also that type is awful, a black outline and white fill...hello MS Paint. Hav, sack the graphic designer...

NEW SINGLE ARTWORK : mýa - mr. incredible

Oh my(a) gawwwwd :( My-My, it'll always escape me how can you have such a fierce album cover (in 'K.I.S.S.') and have all the single artworks look a damn hot mess! Anyone else think that the words "Mýa" and "Mr. Incredible" could be exchanged for "Bargain Bin R'n'B classics 1998 : Volume 2".

NEW ALBUM ARTWORK : ricki-lee - fear & freedom

Hmm. Hmmmmmmmm. Not sure. Not sure at all. I think it's the editing on her skin and (origami?) top, it looks a little cheap 'n' nasty - like a promo flyer for a DJ set at your local club. Ricki, boo, you're better than this.

NEW ALBUM ARTWORK : rita ora - ora

Oh, for goodness sake! I want to like Rita Ora so badly - like I actually find myself putting on 'R.I.P.' or 'How We Do', just to get a few iTunes play counts even though I don't particularly want to listen to either song -  but why is her team making it so difficult! When other blogs or music news sources have compared her to Rihanna, I've always taken it as sloppy journalism and chalked it up to nothing more then that. But, taking her newly released album cover into consideration, all I can think about is..."HI RIRI - CAN'T WAIT FOR YOUR LATEST SMASH!".

This album artwork is ridiculous because:

1. The fact her 90's-pop-band-in-"Top of the Pops" magazine facial expression is producing more feelings of annoyance than joy.

2. The awkward "weathered" look around the edges.

3. The fact the album is called 'Ora'...and her surname is Ora..it looks like the designer forgot to completely delete an initial typography tryout for her name, so now we have two "Ora"s floating around.

4. The fact my eyes were drawn to her watch too quickly, this screams "Rita loves her new Rolex. You will too."

5. THE FACT THIS IS A MASH-UP OF ABOUT 3 DIFFERENT RIHANNA ALBUM COVERS! NOTE TO ROC NATION - TRY HARDER PLEASE!!

Phew. Glad I got that off my chest. Fingers crossed the music is delicious and delightful to the extreme!

NEW SINGLE ARTWORK : colette carr - like i got a gun

Hotmess.com... and if you don't know why I'm saying that, then you need to readjust your eyes and come back to me when you've thought about what you've done.

NEW ALBUM ARTWORK : nicki minaj - ghetto barbie

Oh holy hell...Nicki's done it again :/ An ugly ass cover, leaving me speechless, with chills and in awe (for all the wrong reasons). This UK-only compilation features previously unreleased material from before 'Pink Friday' and the artwork is hella ugly! Why the hell have they used the same letter for "Nicki" as "Minaj" - has the harajuku barbie changed her name to Micki?...mess mess messsss!

p.s. And before you start filing it under fan-made, get used to it being real: it's on the compilation's amazon pre-order page...

NEW REMIX EP ARTWORK : wynter gordon - still getting younger (the remixes)

So I can't find the non "The Remixes" version, but here is Wynter's latest single 'Still Getting Younger' cover... I hate it. She had a formula for the 'With The Music I Die' era art (the black and white image, some illustrative elements, subtle type)...below you can see a burning hot, pile o' mess. There isn't really any redeeming factors, possibly the flash of pink added to her "WG" logo...apart from that I just don't want to look at it :/

p.s. MS Paint called, they are ashamed they had a part to play in this visual disaster...

NEW SINGLE ARTWORK : jennifer lopez - goin in (ft. flo rida)

"hello. this is the 'love?' album era. we'd like our leftover promo shot back please."

j to tha l-o...gurrrl, you are one of the hottest properties in pop, that means you rich mama!...SO WHY ARE YOU USING OUTDATED, OLD-ASS PROMO SHOTS FROM YOUR LAST ALBUM WHEN YOU CAN AFFORD A NEW, FIERCE, UH-MAY-ZANG PHOTOSHOOT?! gives me the shivers about the up coming greatest hits artwork...can anyone say "penny pinching"?....(and remember this isn't the first example of ms. lopez using old pics this era). i'm sad :(

p.s. anyone else thinking she believes she can get away with it as she hasn't changed for like 10 years...which is something to applaud, but surriously...NEW ALBUM = NEW ARTWORK!